I am a mom. I am also a writer with deadlines. By doing both, I've learned a great deal about managing my writing time while not neglecting the family.
While things did get easier when the kids went to school, in the early years it was a challenge. During that time, when I was in the midst of toddler tantrums and sleepless nights, how did I manage to keep writing and selling my novels? Through trial and error, I discovered some tips on how to be a mother and a writer at the same time.
So here they are, in no particular order.
1) Nap time is not clean the house time. It is writing time. Give up on having a spotless house and write. Ask people to call before they come over so you can do a quick clean. This applies to everyone except for your family. They already know how you really live.
2) Get up early or stay up late, whichever works for you. Do not fold laundry. Do not watch TV. Do
not play around on the internet. Write.
3) Buy a Crock-Pot and learn to love it. You'll have a healthy dinner without a lot of effort and more time to write.
4) After your family revolts when you serve yet another slow-cooked meal, find a few other meals you can make ahead of time, or in the morning when the little one is eating. Make them ahead of time and then make sure you get two or more dinners out of them.
5) Delegate the laundry to someone else in the house. The toddler is probably too young to reach the washer and dryer, so recruit an older child or hubs.
6) When the in-laws come for a visit and take over childcare duties, by all mean go have a massage or a manicure, then write.
7) Buy a spiral notebook and pick out a nice pen. In one of the rare moments when you're outside and the child is happily caking himself with mud and could care less what you are doing, write.
8) When your family complains about eating spaghetti for the fourth straight dinner in a row, invite someone else to start making dinner. When the invitation is refused, go back to #3.
9) Buy a lot of clothes for you and your family. This will prevent you from having to do the laundry which is now piling up because #5 failed. Write.
10) Manage your time wisely. You know when your deadlines are so don't wait until the last minute to work on getting your writing done. If you do then plague will strike your house in the form of stomach sickness or strep throat. You will save yourself a lot of stress if you plan ahead, then stick to your plan and write. Also, while writing is fun, time with your children is to be cherished and enjoyed. If you plan your writing schedule wisely, you won't miss out on a minute of the wonderful moments with your little ones.
I hope you find my list of hints helpful. If you do, then check out my books because you need a break.
For more writing life and mom life posts click here and here.
29 comments:
Hi, I’m Anne from Life on the Funny Farm (http://annesfunnyfarm.blogspot.com), and I’m visiting from Super Sunday Sync.
Your blog is great, and I LOVE this post about writing when you have kids. And about not cleaning, cooking, etc. Very funny, but sadly very true.
Anyway, thanks for posting this. If you’ve never visited yet, I hope you can pop by my blog sometime to say hi…
Great tips -- Made me smile! True even after the toddlers graduate high school! thanks so much for sharing on busy Monday!
This is hilarious. I'm trying to do a dissertation in the midst of household chaos and I may never get done. Ever. :)
And to make matters worse, hubby doesn't like Spaghetti (who doesn't like spaghetti??). ;)
Haha ~ I love this!
It is so true that nap time is writing time, not clean the house time!
Thank you for linking your favorite post to Raising Imperfection.
Please come back Friday to see if you were featured! Good luck
Lanaya
www.raising-reagan.com
Nap time really isn't for chores! Great post!
Thanks for sharing your favorite post at Raising Imperfection! We feature our favorites on Friday, make sure to come back and check.
Leslie
www.violetimperfection.com
Hi Georgie Lee! Thanks for stopping by Seriously Kate.
That is a great list of advice. One of the things I have learned is that naptime is my only me time unless of course it's after bedtime. But, I should not clean, do laundry or any sort of chore - just do what I want.. write, nap, watch tv. :)
Kate
http://seriouslykateblog.blogspot.com
It is so hard to be a full time mom AND do your own work!! I know how you feel! Just gotta be flexible! Thanks for stopping by my blog earlier!
Jenna @ http://www.rainonatinroof.com
Oh...this is very helpful. I've got a 3.5 and an almost 1 year old and I have just begun my writing endeavors. Methinks I may have taken too big a bite, but I am starting to get the hang of this not-cleaning-the-house thing. Stopping by from the More Than Mommies Mixer. Greetings!
I need to dust off my crock pot.
This really is a great list!
It is all about making the time, and sitting down to do the writing work. I get distracted so easily. I have to make sure facebook is off when I sit down or it will pull me in.
I adore every single thing about this post. You are SO RIGHT. About everything. And I laughed out loud at the spaghetti one!
I can totally identify with this! Writing with one child napping was awesome... now I have two (4 and 2) and another on the way. I let them watch an hour of TV in the morning so I can write and if they are playing together nicely, then I try to get some more writing done. Check out Leigh Ann Dutton's 20 Minute Meals - she has some great ideas. :) And I've learned to cut way back on my social media - as you say, stop wasting time on the computer! :) Thanks for sharing. (I'm dropping by from the Mommy Moments blog hop.)
Your advice is fantastic. I love especially the crock pot cooking. I am so there with you! I always tell people, "Hey, when I am on the computer I am primarily there to work... (and I occassionally network as well, like right now!)
I am going to share your wisdom. I have lots of writing students who would appreciate your wisdom multifold!
Great to meet you via #SitsSharefest! I am just getting around to reading posts I marked from last week! See, I am disciplined! LOL!
Popping in from UBP! Love this post! Will be following! http://4alittleloco.blogspot.com/2013/04/connected.html
Hey,
I am hopping over from the Ultimate Blog Party. Looking forward to connecting. I am here from 8550 Graphics.
Jessica
http://8550Graphics.com
Love it!!! It seems I'll have such a perfect sentence, or phrase in my head and as soon as I try to get it on paper..."Mommy" is all I hear!!!
Swinging through with the UBP 2013. Hope you have a great day.
Nicky
www.feelingtheemptynest.com
Thank you for joining Second Chance Sunday! I shared, tweeted, +1, and pinned!
I can relate as i am also a mom and a writer.Not that I get paid much for my writing but I do it mostly because I love it. Thanks for linking up to #sundaymommybloggers
Some great tips you have here!
Would love for you to share this with my Facebook Group for recipes, crafts, and tips: https://www.facebook.com/groups/pluckyrecipescraftstips/
Thanks for joining Cooking and Crafting with J & J!
Hi I found your website on Sunday Mommy bloggers link up! These are some great tips and a few I can utilize in my life. Thanks so much for ideas to help me write more.
Great tips. I'm not a writer, but I find that most of these are useful regardless of what job you have. Now my kids are older, but when they were babies or toddlers I tended to make a lot of freezer meals and I also learned to do what ever I needed/wanted (crafting, reading, etc) after everyone was asleep. Those quiet nights are still my favorite time to relax and enjoy.
Not wasting time is essential to so many things! Thanks for the tips and sharing them at the #LMMLinkup.
I can get distracted very easily and get caught up in cleaning the house or doing laundry when I should be taking the time to write. These are great tips and I will definitely try to remember them throughout my day. Thanks!
These are great, I definitely got a giggle out of pawning the laundry off one someone else. I did that years ago, but didn't write while it was being done. Doh! Thanks so much #SaturdaySharefest
I want to hug you right now.
I have four girls under nine, just recently started blogging and writing and am LOVING it. Family...not so much. They have become quite accustomed to me doing everything for them every second. They will dig the four straight days of spaghetti though...
Such great tips! I wholeheartedly agree, you have to carve out time for your passion with little ones running around. No one is going to put what a great house you kept on your grave stone, so it is important to have the mommy time and the me time too. Thanks so much for sharing this with us at the DI & DI Link party. Have a great week.
Thanks for sharing. It's a great reminder that the most important thing to do as a writer is to just write. Nothing will happen if you don't.
This is the best! I needed the smile and the encouragement tonight!
Blessings and smiles,
Lori
Love the humor in this although I know it's true! I am notorious for doing laundry and/or watching TV when I should be writing. And don't get me started on procrastinating with deadlines. That's when something always comes up and I compromise getting my work done on time. Thanks for sharing on #TrafficJamWeekend!
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